We are back to square one.
It is so damn hard to admit this to myself.
We have lost so much. So much. We lost people. Humans with stories and lives are gone and all for simple basic human rights.. Freedom, Social Justice and Democracy.
I don't know where we went wrong! During last week's clashes in Tahrir (Nov19) I saw a side of Egyptians that I have never seen before (was abroad during Jan25). The passion, the compassion, the courageousness, the love, the kindness! Why do bad things happen to good people?
The worst part is Twitter. Sometimes I regret ever having decided to join Twitter. Yet being a Journalist it's crucial to my career especially working in an oppressed country. I get to know people, my problem is getting too attached to people even though I might not have ever met them. I get attached, they get killed/arrested or lose an eye.. and I feel lost and confused and miserable!
I recall a time right after Mubarak stepped down and the smoke cleared, it felt like we conquered it all. I felt free! That was the only time of my life when I truly was not scared of tweeting/blogging or even writing a FB status. I never held back before but I would always have a tiny part of me worried what *might* happen! Not that I was ever a famous blogger/Twitter personality but that was how much the Mubarak regime got to me. I feared for myself though I was a nobody.
We're back at square one. Maikel Nabil is left to rot in prison for exposing SCAF! Alaa Abdel Fattah is being denied presence at his son's birth for simply being a leading activist! Hundreds have died.. for some reason Mina Daniel's murder affected me the most (probably because I dream of him sometimes though in real life we never met). Malek & Ahmed Harara lost their eyes. More than 13,000 civilians are being tried in Military prisons. Activists are being kidnapped. Journalists are state enemy # 1. Torture in prisons/detention centers is top notch.
This all sounds too familiar! This is beyond anything Mubarak did. Especially being extremely condensed.
I really believed we had a chance! I hoped beyond hope for us to get through this and achieve the tiny dream of living like humans. Not being afraid or ever forced to bow down.
Maybe we still do have a chance. Right now I know we're back at square one. We need a revolution. Egypt needs a revolution to save it.
ساعات بخاف تبقى ذكرى، نبعد عنك، تموت الفكرة! نرجع تاني ننسى اللي فات و نحكي عليك في الحكايات!